A Uniquely Entertaining Dream

I have always been strongly influenced by the dreams I had. There were dreams of happiness (usually when I finally establish a loving relationship with my crushes), dreams of sadness (of a death of a family member, more often than not), dreams of adventure (yep, I still have them), and so on and so forth. Lately I have waken up not remembering any of the dreams I had for I have been having this habit of sleeping too lately and too long, thanks to holiday. But this morning, I forced myself to wake up and found myself feeling weirdly entertained by a dream I had last night.

It was about my high school lover. And just like any other high school lover, he's hardly forgotten. He left a very strong impression, equally bad and good. Recalling the memory from our days is aggravating. I had been freed from the pain since I very rarely dream about him (unlike my latest crush who seems to have a habit of visiting me in my sleep).

Well, this dream I had last night pictured us not in a loving and caring mode. The time frame must be of today, because my feelings were portrayed exactly the same as they would be today. You see... we were supposed to be attending this event, this campus seminar. Not together, but our campus joined the seminar separately.

I had known he would be there; he was supposed to be there. Had there been someone to fear our meeting, that had usually been me. Since I didn't feel any kind of fear, I assumed we would meet up there casually. You know, accidentally meet up when we were with our friends...

...but something like that did not happen.

What happens were odd. But it was, in a way, nice.

So, imagine how would you feel if you received a text, angry-toned, telling you that s/he would not come if you came. If you favor the person, surely you would feel awful. If you don't, well, that's their problem. In this dream, I feel like laughing my life out. It was so funny and pitiful (of him). I wondered what happened to him.

Then I heard whispers.

His friends whispered ugly things about me; saying it was because of me that he was sent to the institution where disturbed people take shelter. Out of curiosity, I asked them. And they told me the whole story: that he could not bear being left and alone... and that he hated me with hatred that turned his life to gall (yeah, I quoted the Wuthering Heights), and that had turned him into a disturbed man.

When I woke up, it was hilarious and stupid at the same time. You see, a part of me might have wanted this to happen: to be the one responsible for his happiness and sorrow. So strong does this feeling set in me that I dreamed of it. It must be exactly what happens because I don't believe in dreams as sign.

Well, be it true or not, one thing for sure: I had fun. ;)

Dreams do come true

So...
This is how it feels to watch something you like at the time you like it the most, eh? :3

God was with me all the time yesterday~! With the turned-out-to-be Festival ticket, I could stand right next to the stage and be THIS close to G-Dragon! <3

(REVIEW) "Reluctant Fundamentalist": Facts Flooring

Terrorism has been very closely related to Muslim, at least in the United States post-9/11 living hell. Books, articles, songs, and even movies have taken their part in recording and repackaging the tragedy... with one of the most well-known: "My Name Is Khan", starring Shahrukh Khan. Some still think terrorism is Islam, while others start to reconsider their thought.

"Reluctant Fundamentalist" (2013) is another movie bringing up the issue of terrorism. However, instead of focusing on who's to blame, this extraordinary movie flashes the spotlight on both sides of coin. Adapted from Mohsin Hamid's novel under the same title, the story revolves around a man named Changez Khan, pre- and post-9/11.

As the movie's played, you will find your thoughts swayed between blaming the Pakistanis or judging the Americans. Changez was a rising star in his American company before the WTC bombing occurred. Following the event are drastic changes in Changez' life. There are scenes where Changez seems so unfairly judged just because he looks like a part of the supposedly terrorist's racial clan. Other scenes, however, show how rough the Pakistanis can be for receiving poor treatment from their fellow Americans. This, especially, is shown by Changez' change of behavior.

Overall, this movie talks about how an event which, at first, believed irrelevant can really turn one's life upside down. Then, there is also a talk about identity. Indeed, Changez has his life turned upside down just because he comes from the same race with the terrorists. Too bad, no matter how hard he tries to show his colleagues that not all of them Arabs are ruthless, people already distant themselves from Changez.

"Reluctant Fundamentalist" is one of the successful movie to be wishy-washily neutral. It can be confusing more often than not, but it surely is great. This movie surely deserves to be glorified. Be them facts or fiction, this movie has shown the 'truth' of the 9/11 effect without preferring any sides. So, folks, stop whatever it is you're doing right now and go grab your copy to see how Changez deals with things!

(Courtesy of image: Google)

:)

Love... can be beautiful.

It can be harsh, sometimes. Especially if all you can do is yelling at each other.

It can be bitter when you argue all the time.

It can be difficult, knowing what you think is best turns out to tear you apart.

But love can be beautiful.

When the memories you recall make you smile, it's sweet.

When you catch me staring at you, it's bubbly.

And when both of you lie at night, thinking about each other even though you're apart...

it's beautiful.

Unwritten Page

Hi.
It's nearly holiday, and as everyone of you start to book your ticket to freedom away from complicated friendship/crushes/tons of task/college life, I'm turning the page to a new life experience. Yay!

Tomorrow's the first day ever for me to be interviewed officially for an internship. :) I am literally excited. Can't say I'm positive I'd be accepted, but at least I have the chance. Can't wait!

I guess I've spent too much time being with the same folks, I'd kill for a chance to be with other people. After all, separation can make a great means to turn us inseparable. That, if we know how we long for each other's presence.

Cheerios!

Unlike You

I like nights better than days
I like beaches better than mountains
I like the city better than villages
I like coffee better than plain water
I like talking better than keeping all to myself
I know you like the otherwise
But that doesn't mean I can't like you
I just like you better than anything

(Depok, May 26, 2013)

LPJ

Selamat pagi.

Di pagi buta ini, gue baru saja menyelesaikan LPJ untuk acara yang baru saja lewat. Gue berhasil melewatinya, tentu saja, tapi tidak banyak yang tersisa dari gue setelah menyelesaikan acara itu. Ibarat perjalanan Frodo ke Mordor untuk mengantarkan cincin Sauron, acara itu menguras tenaga gue. :)

LPJ, konon kata mereka yang berpengalaman menulisnya, bagaikan lembaran curhat. Lo bisa nulis apa saja di dalamnya mengenai yang terjadi selama acara. Lo bisa bercerita. Jadi, saat gue menghadapi lembaran digital kosong tadi, gue sudah sangat bersemangat ingin menuliskan semua keluh-kesah gue selama acara. Seperti yang gue bilang, acara kemarin ibarat perjalanan Frodo. Namun... apa yang gue sadari? Gue sudah menulis berlembar-lembar halaman curahan hati dan mendapati sebagian besar harus disensor.

Bukan, sensor itu harus bukan karena kontennya pornographic atau kasar. Sensor harus dilakukan karena tidak semua layak baca, terutama karena yang dicari dari LPJ adalah laporan profesional, bukan keluhan subjektif semata. Jadi, gue hapus lagi sebagian besar dan gue tulis ulang dengan upaya sebisa mungkin menjadikan itu keluhan profesional. Sangat disayangkan, tapi apa boleh buat. :)

Jadi...
Untuk memuaskan batin gue yang ingin sekali menuliskan keluhan-keluhan subjektif, gue akan menulisnya di sini.

Selamat pagi dan selamat menikmati :)

* * *

1. Gue punya banyak sekali keluhan tentang sentralisasi kekuasaan yang ada dalam acara kemarin. Let's say that there was this woman whose position I deeply questioned. Dia adalah pelatih akting dalam pementasan kemaren, dan (supposedly) pembina keseluruhan acara. Tapi caranya bersikap berkata lebih dari itu. Seolah-olah acara ini miliknya. Mengingat panitia acara ini bukan hanya dia, tidak seharusnya dia bersikap seperti itu. Kenapa? Karena dengan bersikap begitu, dia tidak menunjukkan penghargaan pada orang-orang yang telah bekerja untuknya.
2. Keluhan berikutnya adalah terhadap Project Officer pementasan. Sorry that I have no option but to be rude about her since she showed to us how spoil she can be... not to mention useless.
3. Keluhan lain lagi adalah terhadap anggota Divisi Kesekretariatan yang jarang sekali muncul sehingga gue jadi tidak bisa percaya kepada mereka. Tidak bisa gue pungkiri, gue (yang ujung-ujungnya terpaksa meng-handle seluruh pekerjaan kesekretariatan keseluruhan acara) merasa beban gue bertambah.

Kemudian ada permasalahan dengan Project Officer keseluruhan acara yang selalu menjadi tempat gue mengeluarkan uneg-uneg mengenai ini semua.  Akan sangat menyenangkan bila gue bisa berdiskusi dengannya dan menghadapi permasalahan yang gue permasalahkan ini, tapi yang gue dapati setiap gue bercerita padanya adalah total rejection, artinya dia menganggap semua itu bukan masalah. KENAPA? Karena dia 1) Mendukung sentralisasi kekuasaan, 2) Berpikir sentralisasi kekuasaan itu justru membantu panitia, karena panitia jadi tidak harus berpikir apa-apa tapi hey, memangnya kami robot atau manusia kayu?, dan 3) Berpikir bahwa seharusnya gue tidak mempermasalahkan ini semua karene 4) Dia adalah tipe pekerja yang sukarela membantu orang lain tanpa tanda jasa dan sepertinya tidak mengerti kenapa gue tidak bisa sama sukarelanya (oh, tunggu, dia pernah bilang kalau gue sudah tidak ikhlas bekerja, gue bisa walk out dari kepanitiaan karena dia tidak mau memaksa gue. oke).

Sungguh mulia!

Tapi menurut gue, dibanding kemuliaannya itu, lebih penting kebersamaan, kepedulian, dan sense of belonging antarpanitia. That's what committee are for, isn't it? Kalau masing-masing menanggung beban sendiri-sendiri, dimana senangnya? Unless you're a martyr, of course. Tindakannya itu bukan mulia, melainkan tindakan memuaskan diri sendiri.

He has an issue with trusting people, and so do I, but I don't think what he's doing is right. Indeed, he eases people's burden, but he loses the point of working together. Working together does not simply mean being in the same committee. You need to share what's on your mind.

........

Yet I can't help feeling sorry for him.

Mungkin seharusnya gue tidak bicara kepadanya mengenai masalah-masalah yang gue permasalahkan karena gue tahu dia akan memihak. Dan bicara tentang masalah ini berarti menambah masalah bagi orang lain (oke, dia).

Bagaimanapun, gue tidak bisa membencinya. Tidak juga bisa seenaknya walkout dari acara ini. Bekerja dengan Project Officer yang satu ini memang sangat melelahkan mental, tapi entah kenapa ketulusan dan dedikasinya pada pekerjaannya membuat gue tidak mau meninggalkannya. Gue rasa, di masa depan pun, jika ada pekerjaan berikutnya, gue akan turut terjun bersamanya.

Oh, Tuhan.

Untunglah acara ini sudah lewat.